General Tie Competition 2010

Any man who can't tie a tie needs to learn that skill immeditatley. It's a bit like riding a bicycle: once you've learnt you always know how to do it. You might think you're never going to need it, but one of these days you will, and having to ask for help is not on. I'm not suggesting that any of these three gents can't tie their own tie, but I'm interested in how they tie it, and what kind of tie they normally go for.


There's always that classic argument that DC needs a blue tie, GB a red and NC a yellow one. And as you can see, they often feed into these stereo types themselves. But forget about the colour for a while; look at the knot. I'm terribly dissapointed in GB's tie knot; out of these three, he's closest to a Banker Wanker tie. You know, the massivly over sized ones that everyone in the City sports. One wonders what is they're trying to compensate for? It ain't a lack of dosh, that's for sure....


Also, except for the knot, I'm not crazy about the shiny shade of purple he's gone for. Genrelly speaking, fellow gentlemen, avoid purple. It has too much Burton and Bluewater shopping centre about it! Also NC has a too shiny tie, and yellow is rarely a good colour for clothing - even though, in this case, it is his party's fighting colours.


It pains me to say it, but DC is the winner. Blue, out of the three party colours, is by far the most versatile and subtle colour. The Tory knot, surprisingly enough, is also the best one; Where GB's is too big and shiny and NC's a bit too thin and pointy (plus shiny), Cameron has the perfect size and angle...but he looks a bit puffy in the face, doesn't he....